Hold A Heart With Me

My mind works in peculiar ways. I'm not sure if it's different from yours, but it's the way I am. I smile at others happiness, I do not envy. I laugh when things are funny and I don't care for others judgements. I will talk within silent corridors and I will rise above your hate. I will always seek the neglect for the negative and witness the willows of happiness that sweep across my cheek every so often. I will push on a mile from others motivation, but most importantly, my own. But above everything, I will always hold compassion for others and look for love, because love truly does mean everything. Forever I will seek to reach the Flow, and the Flow is eternal content, peace, and that love we're all talking about nowadays. It's all that matters.
This all sounds happy and perfect. Even though it's me it does not mean I always hold true to my morals. I've made mistakes - some I can fix, some I cannot. I've lied to those I love and I've hurt people - sometimes, for no peticular reason. I've hated others because I've envied them. I've been mean, and cruel, and selfish. I can't make excuses, but I'm not the only one. I'll admit to my actions and I'll try my best to redeem, but life isn't always that easy. Sometimes we have the thought in our minds that we really are right or it's just to have done something wrong. But I know better, and I know that I can rise above. Sometimes it's not about who was wrong; it's that you love that person who you're competing with and you'd do anything for them. Not everything has to be a game, and we don't always have to win. Sometimes it's just about making it right.
My life isn't butterflies and purity. It's been an easy start with a rough journey to follow. I've fought myself over the thoughts of deaths and losses I've had to witness, and witness others' hardships as well. My life somehow seems to consist of downs that overthrow the ups. Some days it's hard to get out of bed. I can be impulsive with the anger that sticks to my hands and I can lash out at those who aren't deserving. It's not fair - I've played the victim too. But humans stick to the nature of their roots and some just can't sprout. This saddens me, but I wish to grow into that tree. I know who I want to be and where I want to go. The world can be lonely and at times. I had no one there to hold my hand - maybe that's why it's so easy to hold anger and let go of love. Once you've known the cold touch of the world, you think the rest of us deserve to feel it too. Everything feels so easy to be worthless and yet so meaningful at the same time.
Sometimes you're just a spec of the population that can be washed away with tomorrow's rain, other times you're the one who can make a change. The world is tricky to decipher, yet clear; hopeful and cynical, victorious or doomed. It's incredibly predictable or indefinitely uncertain - and that's why it's so hard to know why we're here. Religion is so key to maintain society but if it ruled the world I'd be the first to die. I won't lie about that. The bible is just words and so are mine - so why do so many believe in the bible? Because it has good morals? Because it comes from "God"? Well I have good morals. I come from "God", so you tell me.
In the end people will choose to hold a heart or hold a cold stone within their hands. I want my morals to push me to where I want to be - I want to succeed but do so while being me. I don't want to change who I am to win the game of life or act like somebody I'm not just to win people over. I won't change myself for the world, but I can change it for others, for the better. Maybe one day we'll see that love is all the matter, or maybe the world will shatter like glass from neglecting all the better. Nobody's perfect, and it should be nobody's expectations. But the world is our oyster and we hold it on a string. It's our actions that effect it slowly, piece by piece, by every tick of the clock. So don't stop being who you are - because I love you, and soon they'll love you for just being you. I'll be me, too. So hold a heart with me. Let's turn into 'We'.
xoxo